Title: Crack in the Wall
Pairing: none really.It’s a band!fic
Comments: This is REALLY crack-ish. You will go “WTF?!” after reading this. Guaranteed.
The Dong Bang boys had one of their rare days off, and Jaejoong was cleaning the house. He
picked up clothes (Junsu’s mess), washed dirty coffee cups (Yoochun’s mess), Cleaned up
crumbs left from breakfast (Changmin’s mess; why he didn’t suck the crumbs up as usual was
strange), and rolled one Jung Yunho out of bed so he could make it up (Yunho obviously wasn’t
very happy about that since he threw a shoe at Jaejoong). After Jaejoong beat Yunho into next
week, he began washing the walls. When he got to the wall next to the T.V., he noticed a
crack in the wall. Obviously this irked him, so he poked it. Unfortunately, the crack moved
and opened its eyes. And bit his finger. This resulted in Jaejoong screaming bloody murder
and alerting the other members. Sadly, they all decided to ignore him in favor of, well,
anything NOT having to do with Jaejoong. Jaejoong was now very pissed off, so he marched into
his room and dragged yoochun out to help him (Yoochun was more than a little annoyed, since
he interrupted his naptime so he kicked Jaejoong in the knee). After Jaejoong kicked him in
the stomach, Yoochun was more than willing to help Jaejoong with his “little crack problem”.
Yoochun examined the crack, sniffed it, rubbed it, sang to it, and then poked it. The crack,
obviously not liking all the poking, decided another biting was in order. So it bit Yoochun’s
arm, which resulted in yet another Dong Bang member screaming. This time, the other three
members rushed out to see what was going on (not because they cared or anything, but because
all the screaming was starting to get annoying). When they asked the soul mates what happened
(the sooner he knew, the sooner he could go back to sleep) they just pointed to the crack in
the wall now singing Miduhyo.
They all blinked. Listened for a few minutes, then blinked some more. Suddenly, Changmin
speaks. “It’s got a nice voice”, he says, “but it keeps adding in lines about food. Maybe its
hungry” The other members stare at Changmin in surprise, not because of what he said, but
because he broke the monotony of the fan fiction by actually TALKING. The crack in the wall
has now gone into it’s own rendition of Hug, singing something about how it wishes they were
his sandwiches for a day. Junsu suddenly perks up and says,” It’s telling us what it wants!
It wants a sandwich!” Junsu beams, feeling proud, despite the looks of horror that are being
shot in his direction. Jaejoong looks ready to faint. He shrieks, “YOU MEAN I ACTUALY HAVE TO
FEED THE DAMN THING?!” The “Damn thing” is not happy with Jaejoong’s comment so he bites him
again. Jaejoong’s MUCH more receptive to the idea of feeding the crack than before, so he
feeds it a sandwich. After that the crack disappears. There should have been some discussion
about what just happened, but instead everyone just decided to never speak of this again and
go back to bed.